Stop Wasting My Time!

Time is something we can never get back. Time is one of our most valuable resources. We must use it wisely, and everyone has the same 24 hours in a day. So, if you know that your time is valuable, you should also know that you don’t have time for anyone to be wasting your time. You should not allow men to be time wasters in your life. I have been at this long enough and have consulted enough people to know that for the most part, most women know very soon if a man is wasting their time. You know what you can tolerate, and you know what you will not tolerate.

I was speaking with someone recently as they expressed their discontent for men who always try to hint at what they want instead of being upfront. This particular guy kept texting her back and forth all day, and she was able to determine well in advance where he was trying to go with the text messaging. She timed it perfectly, as the guy proceeded to hint that he was hungry. He tried to hint that he wanted her to cook something for him. For starters, they were not in a relationship and barely friends. He never came out and asked, but he did everything you could possibly do without asking. She suggested that he cook something or suggested a nice restaurant.  She did not go in the direction he wanted, so of course the text messaging stopped. Stop letting men get away with being lazy. It is his responsibility to show you a good time because you are the gift. Again, I have stated this in numerous posts, the woman is the gift. Yes, there are some spoiled men out there who feel that they don’t have to work hard for their gift anymore because they have been spoiled by women who don’t know they are the gift. However, as a subscriber to Single For 1, you cannot subscribe to that mode of thinking because you know that you are the gift. You should make no excuses for it. YOU SHOULD RATHER BE A GIFT WRAPPED AND SINGLE THAN A GIFT UNWRAPPED AND  UNDERAPPRECIATED WITH A PIECE OF A MAN! A man can only get away with what is allowed. Since when did you cooking for a man you barely know become a good date? You know this goes back to my philosophy of not giving a man husband benefits when he is on a boyfriend plan. I have said this time and time again.

Men are not as slow as they sometime come across. Yes, men can be great at acting. You will hear things such as: “but you do it better than me,” “yeah but I don’t know how to do that,”  “it’s much better with a woman’s touch.” Now here is the big one, “I was just joking.” This is the most famous line used. When you hear this line, open your ears and eyes and put your antennas up even higher. Some men will only say they were just joking if you have alerted them that they have gone too far or if you don’t go down the same direction they are going in with the conversation.  I suggest you check a man early and often if they appear to be stepping out of line. That way, if he is about games, he won’t be able to stay around long enough to waste your time. If you lay down the law early and often, most of the time, the time wasters will disappear because you are not easy enough. Good, let them go. Let them go to some woman who will do any and everything for him just to say they have a man. Again, I will reiterate this as I always do, you are Single For 1. You don’t  have time for a man, you are waiting for your husband. Anything in between is a time waster. Sure, you can learn from past experiences, but you don’t want 20 lessons in the same category before you finally pass. You should be to a certain place after a while where after a few interactions with a man, you can pick up on things quickly because you have learned from past mistakes or lessons.

The problem only comes in when you are afraid of being alone, so you make excuses for the time waster and let him overstay his welcome. The bottom line is a man does not really have that much fun spoiling himself, but he will surely enjoy being spoiled by a woman. The 1 will be more concerned in doing everything he can to make you the happiest women around because he realizes he is the most blessed man around because he is with you. Save your excessive spoiling for someone who is worth investing your time into. That someone should be the 1. Even in that case, if spoiling is going on, it should be mutual. You will be amazed what you will discover when you actually require a man to put in some real work for your time and affection. Anyone can fake it for a short period of time. DON’T AWARD A MAN BASED ON HIS 1ST HALF PERFORMANCE, THE TRUE TEST IS IF HE CAN STAY AROUND LONG ENOUGH TO FINISH THE GAME! You cannot change what a man may do, but I assure you that if you remain consistent with your standards and expectations, time wasters will flee because they are not ready, willing or capable at this time to take what it requires to be with you. Let them carry on as they were without you. For that, I salute you and you ought to hold your head up and unapologetically stand behind that standard.  That is all for now.

Your Relationship Advisor,

The Duke

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